Listening

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If you don’t understand me, how can you lead me? 

Communication, communication, communication. Or is it a lack of effective communication? I see and experience this often in my role as a business coach. The employer/leader says to me, “He is driving me crazy; he frustrates me to no end. I can’t seem to penetrate him and get him to understand what needs to be done." Well, my client is a hard-driving, bottom-line, results-oriented person. Therefore, when he speaks, he at times is like speaking in a foreign language. I have talked with his employee. He is a very mild-mannered, process-oriented person. And by the way, a good loyal employee. The bottom line, they are both equally frustrated. They both see the world differently. One is about results, and the other is [...]

By |2023-07-12T23:42:34+00:00July 12th, 2023|Coaching, Connecting, Development, Leadership, Listening|0 Comments

Communication is the lifeblood.

Author and leadership expert Max De Pree in his bestseller, Leadership is an Art, states “There may be no single thing more important in our efforts to achieve meaningful work and fulfilling relationships than to learn and practice the art of communication." Isn’t that statement so true? Most of our issues with people are typically centered on communication -- either the lack of or missed communication. As leaders, we are prone to be talkers. I know that to be true in my case, just ask my kids. I guess it is true, that many of us enjoy sharing our knowledge, wisdom, and insights. What I have learned over the years is the more people I lead the more I must listen. To be an effective [...]

By |2022-07-07T16:22:30+00:00May 11th, 2022|Connecting, Listening|0 Comments

Our people want to feel this.

Here is what I have learned to be true, deep down in our DNA as humans is the desire to feel connected and be known. Relationship coach Kyle Benson refers to attunement. That is the desire and willingness for someone to travel into your inner world to explore who you are and who you are becoming.... this connection cultivates trust. I found that over time every team member will have a challenging season in their life. How we respond as leaders is crucial. Ideally we would like our team members to leave their issues at home. Guess what, in most cases they can't, somehow their challenges find a way to impact behavior on their daily duties as well as others. [...]

By |2021-07-28T02:29:40+00:00July 28th, 2021|Coaching, Connecting, Leadership, Listening|0 Comments

Ask questions.

"The wise man doesn't give the right answers, he poses the right questions," Claude Levi-Strauss. In developing and coaching people, we must cultivate the habit of curiosity. At times this can be challenging, we are busy and want to get to the bottom line. Nurturing curiosity requires creativity and intentionality--this can take time. Questions are critical to curiosity. Asking questions keeps you informed, in touch, and aware. In reality, how many of us invest time in developing good questions prior to a one-on-one meeting? Here is an idea to consider: set aside ten minutes prior to your one-on-one's and jot down critical questions. Make sure they are open-ended to inspire dialogue. During your meeting STAY CURIOUS, ask more questions as [...]

By |2021-06-15T18:47:19+00:00June 15th, 2021|Connecting, Development, Leadership, Listening|0 Comments

Stay curious and seek connection. 

My friend and mentor John Maxwell said it best with this quote, "Good leaders ask great questions that inspire others to dream more, think more, learn more, do more and become more."  What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word conversation? The answer typically is talking. Guess what? Did you know that 80% of a successful conversation involves listening? Great conversationalists have one thing in common. They ask questions that draws others out. Why is that? Well, it is a simple truth: people like to talk about their favorite subject, which is themselves. In order to have a great conversation, I've come up with an easy technique called the 2C's: curiosity and connection. Be curious: [...]

By |2021-03-17T12:14:36+00:00March 17th, 2021|Coaching, Connecting, Development, Listening|0 Comments
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